Thursday, August 14, 2014

Poor Pecker Pickers !

    Pecker pickers, are YOU a good "pecker picker"? Are you a fair "pecker picker"? Are you poor "pecker picker", or are you an outstanding, "pecker picker"? Chances are unless you are a gay man you do not have a "pecker picker". By and large women are the vast majority of "pecker pickers", and unfortunately all too many women are bad to horrendous "pecker pickers". Why is this? I too have been accused of being told that my "picker", was broken, or that I am a "poor picker", and now I may add that I am a terrible "pecker picker".

     I had never heard the term "pecker picker", until of recent, and I've got to say it fits. In fact it unfortunately fits a great many women. As per a recent conversation with a twice divorced woman she informed me that she liked to say that she was just a "poor pecker picker". I loved it and upon thinking about it, I too am a "poor pecker picker". I guess in terming not being a great judge of character being a "poor pecker picker", one may make light of a character defect in oneself. As they say it's easier to laugh than cry and my choices in men could definitely make one cry! 

    What makes one a "poor pecker picker"? Well, when a woman continuously chooses men who are physically and or verbally abusive,disrespectful, lying, cheating, amoral, alcohol and or drug abusing, unemployed schmucks, they can be deemed a "poor pecker picker"!  Upon listing all of the negative qualities that my pecker picker has chosen I surely should have my head examined.Why would ANY sane individual actually choose a partner with those qualities? The answer is simple, a sane individual would NOT choose a partner with those qualities, any of them. The sad part is many of my choices in men have not had one or two negative qualities as previously mentioned, but several! Quite clearly I and women that have chosen men that are one or more of these negative qualities are "poor pecker pickers"! My question is why do women do this?Why do seemingly smart, attractive, intelligent, and nice women choose men with less than redeeming qualities over and over?

    Change. Change is why women with "poor pecker pickers" choose these men. I believe that like it or not women with "poor pecker pickers" want to change men. Perhaps these women myself included have a need to feel needed, and a need to feel "in charge". Choose a man that's got it all together and what does he need us for? Why a man that's got it going on might actually be nice to us and not disappoint us. A man that's got his act together and is nice can't let us down and be the reason for another relationship not working out. No, "poor pecker pickers", know if they choose a man who is a liar that it won't work out. "Poor pecker pickers" know if they choose a man who doesn't call when he should due to drinking or drugging that they'll be let down. "Poor pecker pickers" also know that if a man they choose lies to others that they'll also lie to them as well. "Poor pecker pickers", know that a relationship with a man that is not together will ultimately fail, and perhaps that's what "poor pecker pickers" want. They want their relationships to be with men that do not have it together so that just maybe if a relationship fails with a great guy it'll be their fault and not the guy's. Or just maybe women who are guilty of being "poor pecker pickers" are afraid of a relationship that could actually be successful. Let me just say that many women are all too often guilty of enjoying drama! Good gracious where would the drama be in a relationship with a man that is nice, caring, moral, non drug using and successful? Why one might just have a nice relationship that actually worked. One might not spend their days worrying or crying. Yes if one became a "good pecker picker" one might just enjoy a relationship for the first time in their life, but why would one want THAT?

   "Poor pecker picker"? Yup that's been me and what has it gotten me? Oh it's given me many failed relationships, much disappointment, a lot of stress, many tears and a divorce. My being a "poor pecker picker" has given me nothing but heartache and drama. As I am not insane, I am at a quandary as to why I have chosen to be such a disastrous "pecker picker"! Perhaps I'm slightly insane or perhaps I and other women like myself feel a need to mold a man into what we'd like them to be as to feel in control and needed. One also doesn't take the time to work on their own faults if their wrapped up in a relationship with someone whom they are trying to "fix". The bottom line is women that are "poor pecker pickers" choose  these men in part due to their NOT wanting to look at themselves and due to their enjoying misery!

    I for one am quite tired of my "poor pecker picker". In fact at the moment my "pecker picker", is not even turned on at the moment. The pecker is going to have to choose me as it is time I truly enjoy being single and getting to know "me". I and other women with "poor pecker pickers"need to realize that life does not need to be torturous, tearful and tumultuous! The truth is I and many other "poor pecker pickers", would love to be in relationships with peckers, but with nice, respectful, and moral peckers not cold hearted, disrespectful, using and abusing peckers and therefore I am saying, "I'd rather be single...for now!"

(c) Sean Bianca 2014 

       

Sunday, August 3, 2014

Tired Of Taking Time...

 

    Sick and tired of being single? I know I am, and I would think most adults with any intelligence would be as well. Frankly I'm "tired of taking the time", it takes to be single! As an over forty year old woman I really am over the whole dating thing. It's a process, and one that gets real old, real fast. Unfortunately not all men and women share my sentiments, and I personally have to wonder about those men and women that actually enjoy being single after the age of thirty five.

     Being single and alone is the easy part. I'm the first to say, "I'd rather be single...for now!" That is I'd rather be single than be with some dip shit,, but the truth is I'd rather be in a relationship than attempting to find the right one. Finding the right one is the hard part. Dating is NOT fun, it's actually quite painful. In fact I'd rather have a root canal than go on a first date with someone new, perhaps that's why I seem to go out with men that are friends whom I've known for some time. It's easy and comfortable. Going out with a man whom I've known doesn't take work. After forty I'm just not into the time and effort it takes for a first date with someone new.

     I who once  loved primping and getting glammed up for dates am now sick and tired of being single, and attempting to look my best for someone who is frankly not worth my time and energy. It takes work to get ready for a date, and work that is many times a gigantic waste of time. Granted thanks to an ex being a psychotic nut job at my not being late, I am an expert at getting ready in a flash, but it's still time consuming. Time that most men these days don't deserve. I guarantee that a  man isn't spending half the time we women do getting ready for a date. If we're so lucky a man will shower and shave prior to a date. Many might be surprised, but I have had a date or two with men that did not so much as even shower prior to going out with me. Seriously? Yes, seriously! As hindsight is 20/20 I now wished I'd just forgone going through with those dates and suggested they use our not happening date to go home and bathe!

     Most women do take a good while to prepare for a date, and for a woman preparing for a date is a rather lengthy process. Most women shower and blow dry their hair prior to a date. For myself my hair is not what it once was so it's a quick dry, but for some women it can take up to three hours for them to dry their hair. After the hair is dry some women flat iron, and some curl their locks, and some place removable hair extensions in their heads. I'm sure men love those. Think about it, a man thinks his date has gorgeous hair, and oops it comes out as he puts his hands through his date's hair! I have to admit I on occasion have done the clip in hair. As for curling and truly "doing" my hair , it's been quite sometime! I do remember having put much more effort into my looks and always curling my hair before a first date. I even curled my eye lashes! Weren't those guys lucky? Wow, I haven't  done either in years! Guess I tired early of attempting to look perfect for a date! Lord knows most men are far less than perfect for a date. Have you observed couples lately? More often than not the woman looks adorable from head to toe and the man appears to have literally jumped out of bed and into whatever happened to be laying out from the previous night! Like I said men are not putting forth anywhere near close to the effort than a woman does in getting prepared for a date. I haven't even spoken of a woman's make-up! Add to a woman's hair, applying make-up and we're up to a good hour and a half for most. Thankfully I am able to do my make up quite quickly, but for some women who opt for fake eye lashes, lip liner, face lift straps, eyelid upper lifters, and God knows what else, we could be talking a good part of the day. I'm quite sure some women have almost all but missed dates due to their make-up application! One can only imagine what these women look like sans make-up, I hate to think! One has to pity the poor bastard that wakes up with those women. I think many of those women would do themselves a favor by NOT applying so much to themselves as to not surprise their date with their real faces. In fact many of those women probably look better without their faces done up. All in all the bottom line is that women put a lot more time, preparation, and energy into a date with a man, and I do believe many of us are frankly "tired of taking the time".

      Perhaps being "tired of taking the time", to get ready for a date sounds lame, and I agree, but it's the truth. I hate to think of how many hours I have wasted on men that would have been time well spent on true friends, family, my dogs or myself! Doing myself up to listen to some egotistical jerk speak of nothing but himself is annoying. Even more annoying is going out with some pompous prick that wants nothing more than to jump in the sack! My last first date attempted to get laid in a movie theater. When getting lucky in the empty theater didn't happen, this man asked me to go home. I informed him that first and foremost we were NOT having sex and second I had to get up early for work. Upon my stating I needed to wake up early this man said, " oh it won't take long, thirty minutes"! I wished I'd replied, " then what's the point?" I humored him instead and said my good byes. Nonetheless I wished I'd spent that evening at home with my dogs than with some schmuck that could give two shits about me and just wants to get his rocks off. Sad that a seemingly intelligent man doesn't want more out of life! 

      Yes, I am" tired of taking the time", to get ready for an evening of a wrestling match with a man to get off of me, meaningless conversation, and endless boring dinners. Jaded? Yes I may be, but I'm "tired of taking the time", out of my life for someone that doesn't deserve my presence, and I would hope most intelligent adults, male or female would share my sentiments. I guess one never knows if they don't try, but after a few nights from hell with the likes of what I've been out with, who could blame me? As I am "tired of taking the time", I am happily saying, "I'd rather be single...for now!"

(c)Sean Bianca 2014


Sunday, July 20, 2014

Sex Or Stability?

    Sex or stability? What do men and woman really want after thirty? I and most, would like to have it all. Unfortunately the general consensus is that having both great sex and stability is an impossible combination. Is it really? Is great sex and stability an impossibility or are many of us just settling for one or the other as we're too impatient to wait for that man or woman with whom we have great chemistry AND friendship, and someone on whom we can depend?

    As per a recent conversation I was informed that great sex AND stability were NOT possible. The combination of outstanding chemistry and reliability appear to be nothing more than a fantasy for most. Many women attribute great sex, with a bad boy. Likewise, most men attribute great sex with a bad girl. Is it true that great sex can only be had with the bad boy? Is it fact that a man may only have great sex with a bad girl?

   Many women seem to have this hope that a James Dean type will come into our lives and take us to places never been. Women like to fantasize that this bad boy will drive up in his sports car, or motorcycle, attack us like there's no tomorrow, and take us away. As stupid as it may sound, it's true. All women, or most want a "bad boy" that will take us by surprise while he grabs us somewhat forcefully, and brings us in closely making our hearts beat out of our chests. All this, while  of course pulling our hair and kissing us passionately. Who ever said, "a kiss is just a kiss", I assure you had never been truly kissed! 

   As many women have a dream for that of James Dean, many men have a dream for Marilyn Monroe, or Angelina Jolie. A good lot of men find themselves continuously pursuing the "bad girl" with whom they may have raw, rough and tough sex and not make "love". These men seem to get off on the "bad girl", in her six inch stilletos, plump lips, and tight fitting dresses.The "bad girl" is the girl men want for errotic sex, but not the girl whom they wish to marry or whom with they will settle down.

     Sex or stability? Must we make a choice? Many would say yes, I say not. I do believe the bad boy that may well offer us excitement and crazy chemistry will not be the man whom will stick by us in old age. I also the believe the big lipped, bad girl oozing sex appeal will not likely be the woman that will be by a man's bedside, when he is in poor health. While seeing that these bad girls and boys are not stellar choices for a lifelong partner, I also am of the opinion that we must not settle for not stability without good or great sex either! 

    Sex or stability? Must we choose? I say not. While men may gravitate towards the buxom, blond bimbos for great sex, is she a man's only chance for great sex? At the same time, is the tall dark brooding bad boy,  a woman's only hope for having the earth move? No! In fact, many women that have slept with every man from here to Timbucktu may not be half as good in the sack as the sophisticated, conservatively dressed proper woman. Surprisingly many of the sluttiest women don't even like sex much less love it! Why would they? Many of these more promiscuous women have been on their backs since the ripe old age of twelve. At the same time while women are of the belief that a bad boy may be her only chance at rocking her world, she is incorrect. Many "bad boys" aren't as into sex as one might think. It's hard for a "bad boy" to rock any woman's world when he's overly intoxicated or high on blow. That being said, women might be surprised by the more straight laced conservative man. It's no secret that many of D.C.'s politicians are not immune to that of a sex scandal or two!

    Sex or stability? Must we make a choice? No. We don't have to make a choice. Lest us not forget that the best sex comes when two people are truly in love. As much as men hate to say it, they too admit that their best sex was with the women with whom they were in love. Even sluts and studs agree that wham bam thank you ma'am, is nothing as compared to making love. When making love with someone with whom we are in love, it's real and it's far better than that brooding bad boy, or plump lipped voluptuous bad girl. 

   Sex or stability? I say both. I say we can all have both if we are patient enough to allow it to happen. One never knows with whom they may fall in love with, and what may transpire. Personally I choose both great sex and stability. I choose to not live without one or the other. While great sex is a must it will not stand by me in difficult times, and while I do need someone whom I may depend upon, it will not be enough to keep me satisfied, but that's just me, or is it? I don't feel we should "settle", as it's been tried and tested. I am choosing BOTH sensational sex, and stability, and if it doesn't come my way, "I'd rather be single ... For now!
(C)Sean Bianca 2014

Sunday, July 13, 2014

I'd Rather Be Married.... Now !

            I'd rather be married...for now ! How many men and women would in fact rather be married for now than be single? I would bet, plenty. In fact I would not be surprised if a good majority of the single population would prefer to be married than remain single. As many people are saying "I'd rather be single...for now," are also saying, "I'd rather be married...for now", if not more!

        It sucks being single! There I said it. As much as I blog on, "I'd rather be single...for now", I personally do NOT relish being single. Due to my not loving the single life I stayed in a bad marriage FOUR years too long, until it was so bad, I had to leave. I loved being married. I just didn't love the man I was married to. That being said brings me to many marrieds that choose to be married...for now!

       Would I personally rather be married? Yes! I'm forty-six years old for Christ's sake! I'm over "dating". I'm over the "getting to know you", conversation. I'm sick of meeting new men. I'm sick of  meeting their friends,and wasting my life. I'm sick of spending time with people whom I later find out are complete basket cases, schmucks, liars, losers, or self centered assholes. Likewise, I'm sure single men over the age of forty are also tired of taking out shallow, using, inconsiderate, immature lushes and bimbos. My god, after forty we've had it with the "singles scene". Well at least most of us that have half a brain are done with the "singles scene".

     "I'd rather be married...for now", is what thousands of men and women are saying. They'd rather be married, than go back to trivial conversations at bars with men and women they'll most likely never see again, or for that matter even remember, due to their heavy intoxication! They'd rather be married than go home to an empty house every night. They'd rather be married than sleep alone. They'd rather be married than have meaningless sex with another drunk or slut. They'd rather be married and wake up to someone they've known for more than 24 hours. They'd rather be married and build a life with someone than spend a night, or month or two of their lives, to only begin again with someone new. It's true, I do believe a good lot of people are saying they'd rather be married, because being single is downright dreadful!

    I do believe that if a man or woman is in a marriage that while it may not be "perfect", is pretty "good", or decent, they should stay married. Heck, if a marriage is even mediocre at best I think they should stay married. I believe way too many people get divorced due to their thinking that the grass is greener somewhere else. In my opinion, unless a man or woman to whom one is married, is being verbally or physically abusive, cheating, using drugs, or abusing alcohol and or the children, one SHOULD stay in their marriage. Why leave a marriage that isn't broken? I say put more effort in your marriage, if it's not more exciting or satisfactory. Then again a marriage to anyone is not supposed to be a 24 hour playground, or party. I guess if one wants rockets, fireworks, and fun then one can be an eternal dater. Crazy chemistry doesn't last forever with anyone, but if that's all one desires then one can forever seek to have "honeymoon periods" for a month or two with their partner and move on to another. Of course good luck with that when you're eighty! 

     I'd rather be married...for now", sure I would, and I know a good many people are indeed saying that. Unfortunately for us that are still single, divorced or widowed we are far better off saying, "I'd rather be single...for now", than be with a complete ding dong, dweeb, lady lush, or twit! I'm happier than I've been in awhile saying I'd rather be single...for now". I'm happy because I have good friends, and interests with which I can occupy my time. I'm happy because I'm not with some knumknut that I am settling for as to not be alone, but I'm not completely satisfied either. I would like to meet someone with whom I can come home to, and with whom I can grow old. I do not wish to be found dead rotting some thirty days after I have croaked! I would like someone by my side at the end, but someone who truly care about me and whom I enjoyed spending quality time. I one hundred percent understand those who would rather be married...for now. In fact I hope a good many are married forever. I believe in the sanctity of marriage, in marriage between two people that truly like and love each other, and two people that have fun with one another. As for me I know at the moment I am far better off saying," I'd rather be single...for now!"
(c)Sean Bianca 2014
          

Friday, July 11, 2014

The Misconception Of "The One"!

 The one", the "one" that makes our hearts go pitter patter, the "one" that "gets" us, and we "get" them, the "one" with whom we have a "connection", and the "one" that is our soul mate till death do us part, the "one". Is there a "one"? Is there really just "one" person out there with whom we can fall in love, and have a life with? Is the whole concept of "the one", one we should follow or is it one we should flee? 

      As per a recent radio show featuring Matthew Hussey author of "Get The Guy" I was prompted to write this blog. Mr. Matthew Hussey brought up a very good point regarding "the one". What he said was if there is just "one" for everyone then does that mean regardless of how he or she treats us we stay with them due to the fact that we were once convinced that they were "the one"? Answer, yes. I think many of us, both men and women, do in fact stay with their partners no matter what, due to the fact that we are sure that they are our "one" and that there is NO ONE else!

      "The one", yes  I too have thought that there was "one" for everyone, and now I see just how insane a thought that is. With over 7.046 billion people in the world, the thought that we all have just "one" soul mate is rather ridiculous, and yet many of us do believe that we need to find our "one". Not only do many of us hope to find "the one", but no matter what when we do find "the one", we need to make it work. In fact we believe we MUST make it work, because remember we have only "one".

     The misconception of "the one", has led many men and women to great despair, including myself. It's true that a "connection" is hard to come by, but if we are truly honest we all have had more than "one" connection. We all have thought when a relationship went bust that we would never ever , ever again find another connection as strong as the last, and we were wrong. We all have bounced back, and again at some point found another connection, but again when we do, we think it could be our last chance at "the one".

     In believing in the whole "one" philosophy many of us have put up with more crap than anyone should. I've seen men disrespected, cheated on, and used, and yet these men stay in relationships all due to their belief that this bitch from holy hell is their "one". Likewise I've seen many women with whom men have abused, been unfaithful to, and been down right nasty to, that have remained in relationships because they had found "the one". I guess "the one" could be that of a Charles Manson, or Ted Bundy and women would still stay due to a "connection", and their thinking these men were "the one". Pretty ludicrous, don't you think?

    How ridiculous is it that so many of us have allowed ourselves to be treated less than because we truly believe that we have found "the one". Newsflash, if a man or woman treats their partner poorly then that man or woman is NOT "the one". Let me also add that if there is no other for us than a person who treats us poorly we are better off alone! Much better. Unfortunately many of us do not believe that we would be better off with no one than with someone who we believe is our "one" that treats us like crap. 

   Nonsense! I myself have jumped through hoops trying to make relationships work with men whom I thought to be "the one". What I accomplished was making myself miserable and the man I was with empowered.I now see the insanity in thinking that there is only "one", for me. Thank God, for Matthew Hussey for bringing this to light. I have killed myself, and put up with more lies, disrespectfulness, and mistreatment because I though that there was only, "one". I recently dated a man who informed me that I was not in the best shape, not firm enough, I was too fat, and not healthy. Bare in mind that I range between a size two and four, and am a tennis teaching professional. I put up with this, from a man some thirty pounds overweight. Why? The answer is simple, I didn't want to be single, and I thought we had a "connection". Upon this man being away on business for two weeks it dawned upon me that I was far happier without him in my life than in my life. I no longer have this man in my life, and I say good riddance! Nonetheless, I realized that yes we can be happier alone than with someone. That being said taught me that the relationships that I thought were with men that were "the one", in which I struggled putting up with such B.S., were just a big mistake. Those relationships were a big mistake, due to my thinking that these men were my "one" and that I had no other chance, thanks to the misconception of, "the one"!

     The misconception of "the one" is vast, and I think we all need to abandon the whole thought process that we only have' "one", soul mate. With over 7 billion people in the world I would bet that we all have quite a few soul mates, and with that knowledge I think we all can relax. We can be confident that we need not put up with not being treated well by someone with whom we ONCE believed were "the one", because we will come across another. It is true, it is better to be alone than with the wrong "one", and that's why I am still saying, "I'd rather be single...for now!
(c) Sean Bianca 2014

Sunday, June 22, 2014

It's YOUR Dick!

        As a young woman in my twenties and thirties, I had the mindset that all men were horny. My opinion of men was that all men from their teens on had a one track mind and that one track mind was "sex". Not only was I under the impression that all men thought about and wanted was "sex", but I also thought ALL men could get up and at em without any problems. I guess I just assumed that that's what a man's thing did. I thought all dicks were ready for action whenever needed or wanted. For that matter I also thought that men had times when their things sprang into performance mode when not wanted as well. Bottom line I thought all men with dicks and I believe that is all men, had dicks that could get up and go, I was wrong. I was very, very, very wrong.

       Who knew that a penis could not always get up? I didn't. Turns out I was clueless. I had no idea of men having dicks that didn't work. Personally I think I preferred it that way. Seriously, ignorance is bliss, and I rather liked thinking that men had this tool that could perform when needed. It was sort of the one amazing things that all men had going for them so I thought. I know Freud said that most women suffered from penis envy, and that couldn't be further from the truth. I have never had a desire to have a dick, but I did think that the dick was a rather fascinating part of the human anatomy, until now. 

     All good things must come to an end and such is true of my opinion of a man's dick. Apparently a man's dick does not always work properly. The stories from friends are quite depressing. I have heard tales of men not getting it up, getting it almost up, getting it up to only rapidly fall down, and getting it up but then not being able to close the deal. What the hell is going on? Who knew that dicks did not always work? I guess if a computer can crash, so can a dick, but what then? What then is apparently men are turning to blaming their significant other for their dick not being able to get up and perform. Yes, many men are blaming women for their failure to do the dirty deed. I'm sorry am I missing something? It's YOUR dick!

      How amusing that many men have taken to faulting women for their inability to have sex. It would seem to me that these men know of their problem and therefore lash out at whom they are with as to make them feel like it's their fault.A woman's fault that a man can't get their dick up? How is that? It's their dick, it's attached to them and they control it, so just how does a dick not becoming erect the woman's fault? 

    A wet noodle of a penis is NOT the woman's fault. Many men that are real men will be the first to admit that due to their excessive alcohol intake they have at times lost their erection. Whiskey Dick I believe is the proper term for a man in this predicament. Other men having issues, (I'll say) are quick to tell a woman that they are on meds that cause them to not be able to get it up, and good for them in being honest. However all men are not so kind, in fact a lot of men are less than kind, and women are starting to get quite upset. Unfortunately there are a lot more men out there that have limp dicks than one might think. According to one friend, it's an epidemic. It would seem that after the age of forty,  things start going downhill quite fast, literally!

      After my divorce I wanted a man that was attractive, intelligent, athletic, successful and nice. Never did I think that I needed to add a working dick to my list of what I hoped for in a man. The thought never ever even occurred to me. Great, another requirement to be added to my list of wants in a man, a working dick! As per a conversation with a friend over fifty I was quite disheartened. Apparently men over sixty are an utter disaster in the bedroom. As some men over sixty are unable to spring into action others take FOREVER to finish the deal, if ever. One has to feel for the woman that thinks she has found a man with whom she is compatible and crazy about, that is disappointed in the bedroom. Nonetheless what a waste of time and effort. I can not imagine spending time with a man to then find out that he is a putz in bed. Life is too short to spend months with someone that can't do it, but then I ask, why? I do believe Viagra and Cialis were invented for the dicks that can't do their thing. Thank God for modern medicine! Now if only God could make all men with limp dicks swallow their pride and get a prescription.I know if I were a man with a limp dick I would rather suck it up and take a pill or two than not be able to get it up!

    It's your Dick! Not hers, not anyone else , it's all yours. In my opinion men that can't do it should either withdraw from dating, take a pill, or work on their issues. Men should not ever blame a woman for their downfall. A woman can be understanding and patient, I'm sure, but a woman will not be if a man insults her in making his "issue" her fault. Frankly I'm terrified of being single after fifty. I'm finding it difficult enough after forty. I don't know how women can avoid being let down in bed. Perhaps over dinner women should casually put in conversation, "and how are things down there? Everything in good condition and working?" I just don't know. What I do know is women have had it with men that can't operate their dicks. Furthermore women have really had it with being blamed for men's sexual inadequacies, and that is why many women are walking away from these men and saying, "I'd rather be single...for now!
(c) Sean Bianca 2014 

      

   
      

Friday, June 20, 2014

Did You Defriend Me?

        "Did you defriend me from Facebook again?" A recent question texted to me from a man I dated. Yes a MAN I dated. Not a teenager, not a college freshman,not a kid, but a grown man. Not only was this man who texted me a MAN, but he was a forty-eight year old man at that. How amusing that a man in his forties is actually keeping track of his friends on Facebook. How ridiculous that a man at his age actually has the time to regularly tally his friends on Facebook. Perhaps this is the norm for grown men on Facebook. I just don't know, and frankly I don't really care. Then again I do care. I care in that I hope that the majority of grown men that participate on Facebook are not tallying their friends regularly. It is my belief that most men are above such nonsense!


      "Did you defriend me on Facebook again?" The answer to this man was, "YES", and any man with half a brain would not actually text a woman and question a woman on if she did indeed "defriend" him. It is in my opinion that a man should have some common sense and figure that there must be a reason as to why he had been "defriended"! Most men would not be so pompous as to ask a woman if he really were "defriended". Of course that is MOST men. Most men do not walk around thinking that they are God's gift to women that are clueless as to how to treat a woman! Most men are not pompous asses without reason. Most pompous asses are pompous with reason, but not this man. No this man was clearly quite surprised that he had been defriended by yours truly.

    I must admit I originally defriended this man when this man had initially pissed me off. After some time had passed I thought I could be the bigger person, and friend him again. After all, in my last conversation with this man I had told him that I was no longer interested in hanging out, and I thought I could at least be "Facebook friends". I guess I figured I'd throw him a carrot. I was wrong, oh so very, very wrong. Upon seeing this man's puss pop up periodically, I decided that there was a reason as to why I never cared to go out with this man again. The reason was quite simple. The man was a complete dipshit that did nothing, but tear me down as we dated. This man tore me down to the point I once asked him, "why do you want to date me if it appears that you don't seem to like anything about me?" Seriously, the man was a criticizing piece of crap whom I really cared never to see again. I realized when this man was gone for a couple of weeks that not only was I was happier not seeing him, but I was in a better mood, and I was also more sure of myself as well. I was reminded of the saying that one can be happier in being alone than in being with the wrong one. Upon this man's return I informed him that I was not interested in seeing him even as a friend. Why I felt obligated to re- friend  this man I am not quite sure, but ultimately I decided to defriend this man for good!

   "Did You defriend me?" "Yes,yes I did, and I am quite proud having done so. Never did I think a man of forty-eight years old would ask me if I defriended him. What is he in the seventh grade? Apparently so. Not only did I defriend this man, but I defriended others as well. Why? The answer is not complicated, it is  simple. I defriend people because it is my perogative, and I do not wish to have those people as Facebook friends. As for this man I once dated, I do not wish to view his postings, and he should be intelligent enough to know and not be surprised at his being defriended. When a woman says, " I do not want to hang out with you", she is saying that she is not interested in you. That all being said I have to wonder about this man's state of mind. Perhaps it's denial, or maybe it's stupidity. Whatever it is I thought this man to be somewhat of an ass for asking if he had been defriended and it further validated why I walked away and said, "I'd rather be single...for now!"
(c)Sean Bianca 2014