Just recently I learned of a friend's engagement. I am quite happy for her. I'm also quite happy for myself. Why am I so happy? I'm happy as this friend is proof of how "letting go", and walking away from someone whom she once loved was the absolute best thing that she could have done. She and I went through break-ups at approximately the same time, and now at a year later she is happily engaged and I am still saying, "I'd rather be single...for now." The fact is, she "let go" and allowed her life to move on, while I desperately tried to hold on. I continued to see my ex for almost a year, dated a "seat filler" here and there, wasting more time. While in the same period of time, my friend completely "let go", met someone, and is happier for it. I can recall a picture of my friend on a motorcycle with her now fiance on Facebook. I looked at that photograph of my friend "glowing", as her hair blew in the wind and I knew she had truly let go and was moving on to something pretty great! The photo was truly a "thumbs up" moment. She really is a perfect example of what TO do, while I am clearly an example of what NOT to do.
The truth is I save everything! Good God I still have some clothes from when I was in High School, and I am quite proud to be capable of wearing them if I so care to do so. Have I worn these clothes? No, but it's that not being able to "let go" that keeps them in my closet. The funny thing is many of my old things I enjoy looking at now and then as to reminisce. Thankfully we don't keep "exes" in our closet. I do not think I would I would feel the same fuzzy feelings over many of my exes as I do an old cashmere sweater. Then again many or most of my exes were friendly endings, however life goes on.
"We must close the last chapter as to go on to the next", has been said again and again. Friends of mine have said "when they're done they're done",and I have thought being done was proof that one never cared, but I was wrong. Being "done", and "letting go", is releasing a person from our lives that no longer added to our lives, but took away from our lives. I stayed married for four long years as I was afraid to "let go". What did it get me? Nothing. Due to my not being able to walk away from an unhappy marriage, I wasted time, and time can't be bought and it can never come back. "Letting go" is not being cold, uncaring, or unfeeling, it's being smart. "Letting go" is allowing us to move on and let life "happen".
"Letting go" of things has never been easy for me, but I've changed. I currently do "let go" of old clothes, shoes, books, etcetera as I rather enjoy the empty space. I am now able to find that which was old and cherished that I could never find, and to store the "new" things that I might acquire. Likewise I have "let go" in personal relationships as well. As saying good bye to things makes room for new things, saying good bye to an ex, makes room for not an ex but a "current beau". "Letting go" is the way to go. It's a good feeling, it's a release and I highly recommend it. "Letting go", certainly worked well for my friend and it can work for anyone else as well. I have "let go and am very happy in saying, "I'd rather be single...for now!"
(c)Sean Bianca 2014