Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Saying "Good-bye" To Stereotypes!



           All men who've never been married by the age of 40 are either gay or self centered assholes. All divorced men are liars, cheaters, gamblers, drug addicts and, or alcoholics. All successful divorced men over the age of forty only date boobalicious, nincompoop twenty year old women. All divorced women want a man with money. All divorced women are horny sluts. All divorced women are lushes. All single and successful women are bitchy and cold. On and on it goes. Stereotyping, we've all done it, do it and will most likely do it again. Is it fair? Is it right? Is stereotyping accurate, or just an easy way to make ourselves feel better about being single? Could stereotyping also be how we protect ourselves from getting hurt yet again. Stereotyping, Does it help, hurt, or hinder us?

        I for one have throughout my life categorized men and many times I have been right in doing so. I've always said that the only men that were available were the ones no one wanted. It made perfect sense as if the available men were that great of a commodity they wouldn't be available. The reason men are single is quite simply because no one else wants them. If no one else wants these available men why should anyone else want them? Why would I want them? Why would anyone want them. If a man is available there must be a catch, because a good find of a man is never ever available. 

       A great catch is what? A great catch is attractive, athletic, intelligent, somewhat sophisticated, fun, successful, mature, kind, patient, respectful and much more. In all honesty I don't think a truly great catch even exists, but if any man has even a third of those qualities he is probably taken. Mature good men are usually married by the age of thirty five. These men that choose to get married before the age of 40 are good guys. They are normal guys that have grown up, fallen in love and are ready to start the next phase of their lives. These men are normal, decent good men. Hence why they are taken. If these men were womanizing Casanovas, they would be available, they would be one of the many single and available schmucks.They would be the men that no one wants.

     Perhaps generalizing is unfair. Perhaps my placing men in one big clump of good guys versus dodos is wrong. The truth is all men are not one in the same. Similarities? Yes, but not the same. As men have had the capability to surprise me I am not quite sure my stereotyping men has been fair. All men that are divorced do not only date twenty somethings. Only the insecure men with a need to look like that of a father figure feel a need to run around with women half their age. All men unmarried by the age of forty are not all gay or bi-sexual. What they are is possibly gay, bi-sexual, or self centered, greedy assholes that are so picky they will never ever settle down. All divorced men are not necessarily divorced, due to their being drunks, cheaters, or addicts. Just maybe some men are divorced due to their wives being less than perfect. Perhaps some men have not been the cheater but the one who was cheated on. Let it be said that as men are far from perfect women are not saints either. In fact I have heard women are cheating just as much if not more than men these days. Case in point, one can not stereotype, as who knew that PTA moms were becoming pill popping, cheating, drunks?

        Stereotyping, what can be said for those who stereotype? What it says is that those who stereotype are ignorant and pigheaded. As I am a divorced woman, I am quite unique. I am nothing like all divorced women. I am also available. If all men shared my attitude, my being available would be due to my being a bad egg or a woman no one wants. That would be untrue. The truth is I do have interest, lots of interest, but I'm doing something I've never done to hopefully obtain something I've never had. I'm staying single. I'm running away from men with whom I may have fun, common interests and such but whom I have doubts. For once I am listening to my gut when my gut tells me someone is not right. I'm making way for the "right one" to come along instead of settling for the "wrong one". Does that mean I'm a woman no one wants? No it says, I know what I want and I'm not settling for less. Likewise perhaps the men whom I have stereotyped as selfish, uncaring fools are doing the same. Just maybe some men would prefer to be single than remain in an unhappy marriage or settle for a relationship that's doable, but not phenomenal. 

       I'm through with stereotyping. Many times I've discounted men due to my generalizing and lumping men as one in the same. Perhaps all men are not the same just as all women are not all the same. The fact is everyone is their own person. Men and women are not the same they are unique. Similarities? Of course but every man and woman is their own person just as every one's situation is their own as well. We are unique and our circumstances are unique as well. Perhaps I'll give the next man I perceive to be a self centered, egotistical asshole a shot. Who knows? I could fall in love! Until then "I'd rather be single...for now!"
(c)Sean Bianca 2014

Friday, November 21, 2014

The Man In The Blue Shirt!





      Nick & Johnnies in Palm Beach was the venue, a place I frequent quite often, and a spot I like a lot. Fabulous food, reasonably priced, pleasant atmosphere, and superb service. My birthday was the occasion, and my friend's treating me to dinner was well appreciated, but a man in a blue shirt made this night out all the more enjoyable. Yes, I do love a man in a suit, but there's just something sexy about a man in a blue shirt, especially this man in a blue shirt.

     What was so special about this gentleman in a blue shirt and was it the shirt or was it the man in the shirt? Oh just about everything appears to be special with this guy. Could it be that he's one of the owners of this hot spot and another as well? Could it be that this man is extremely good looking with his sexy sun bleached hair? Could it be his piercing blue eyes? Could it be his perfectly tanned skin, darling smile, charming personality, or all of the above? I say all of the above.

    From the time I met this particular man in a blue shirt, I was taken. Being an owner of several restaurants and bars and a successful one at that he makes his presence known and the clientele likes that. This owner is not just like any other owner, and why this man is so successful. Once this man sees you at one or more of his establishments he makes you feel welcome and makes you feel as if he truly appreciates your patronage. He makes you feel all the more welcome if he kisses you hello with a peck on the cheek, and makes trivial conversation with eye contact, a rarity with men these days. No wonder I patronize his place so often. It's not everyday a woman gets to feel special by a man as handsome as this one. Yes this one in a blue shirt.

    Truth is not just any man could put on a blue shirt and catch my eye. No, many men have worn shirts in various shades of blue and done nothing for me. My ex husband wore a blue shirt on  our first date. He also wore that shirt on the day of our mediation. Funny how things change, but this man in a blue shirt after seven years in Palm Beach has not changed. Always charming, always sexy, he's consistent.

    As I am quite taken by this man in a blue shirt so is he I might add. This man is taken as in very MARRIED, and his wife is a lucky woman. It's true what they say, "the best ones are always taken", not always but almost always. Some women would care not of a man being hitched, but I do believe what comes around goes around. Nope even though I could like and do like the man in a blue shirt I will continue my search for my man in a blue shirt, or hope my man that dons a blue shirt finds me. Until then "I'd rather be single...for now!"
(c)Sean Bianca 2014

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Acceptance, Attitude, and Angels





               
           "Everything happens for a reason", "you're right where you are supposed to be", "some people come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime, and so on. So cliche', that's what I always thought.I heard the various sayings, but didn't truly "hear" them, until of recent. I've gone through life being told whenever everything didn't work out as I'd hoped, that "it wasn't meant to be", or that my life was taking a different path. Frankly upon being told those very cliches, I've been somewhat angry, frustrated, and disappointed. I was wrong. I finally concluded that the annoying sayings of which I heard again and again, throughout my life, were in fact true.

         "Acceptance", not a word I've ever been particularly fond of. The truth is throughout my life I've had a number of circumstances and relationships that didn't quite turn out how I had planned. To be perfectly honest, nothing in my life at present is how I planned it. As a fifteen year old I had visions of my life being quite different from how it has all turned out. I was supposed to play professional tennis, be an actress, get married to my "Prince Charming", have one or two children and live happily ever after. Just like the movies. Why I had my life as a Meg Ryan chic flick. Unfortunately my life didn't turn out anything like I had expected. Tennis Professional? No, after two knee operations and four shoulder operations, I learned a playing career was not meant to be. I am currently a teaching tennis professional. Actress? I appeared in several Coca Cola commercials, did a couple of "Chemical Bank" commercials, a Florida orange juice commercial, a tennis instructional video, and did a brief stint in a horror movie which almost ended up on the cutting room floor. That being said, I hardly took Hollywood by storm. My Oscar hasn't materialized as of yet. "Prince Charming"? Nope, "Mr. Right", never appeared, or if he did I missed him. I got married at the age of thirty five to a man that I thought fit being the "right one", trouble was he wasn't the "right one". I knew a month prior to my marriage that I was probably marrying the wrong man, yet I went through with the wedding regardless. Four years later I was divorced. Children? I never had them, and thankfully not with my ex. No my life did not turn out anything like I had expected, and I was told, "everything happens for a reason".

         I've been now divorced for seven long years. In those seven years I've dated,and I've been single. Happy? Not really. I've been aggravated with having to be in this place in life in my forties, but as they say, "I'm right where I'm supposed to be". In the past I've laughed at the cliches and fought them as well, but "acceptance" is indeed the key. It's taken time, but at present I have "accepted", my position in life. First of all,I have no choice, but TO "accept" my life as it is, and second I have learned that if I truly "accept" where I am, I am a whole lot happier and at peace. I have to "accept" that I may not know all and even though I may not like where I am in my life today, I am right where I am meant to be. "Accepting" my life, as it has turned out has truly been a blessing and made me all the happier for it, as in "accepting" my life I have adopted a whole new attitude on life.

       How can one possibly have a good attitude if one doesn't "accept" their situation? They can't. Many men and women make themselves miserable in not "accepting" their life and in doing so they not only make themselves miserable, but everyone else around them as well. No one wants to be around a man or woman still pining for their ex some ten years later. It's not pretty. As to which is worse, a man being a love sick cow, or a woman still being pathetically in love with an ex? I'm not sure. Neither one is a pretty sight. In observance, those of whom are not "accepting" of relationships not working out are preventing themselves from moving on and being happy. Likewise, if one is dis- satisfied with their lives, and how it is at the moment, one is in a state of discontent, and turmoil. "Acceptance"is key and when we "accept" our lives as how our lives are meant to be, one can have a whole new "attitude" and outlook on life. In having an "attitude" of "accepting" ones life as it's supposed to be, one can have a truly great "attitude", and in turn live in peace and harmony.

       Peace and harmony? Acceptance? Is this "Ms. I'd rather be single...for now?" Yes, and as much as I feel like a religious nut, of which I am not, I feel pretty good. I feel good as I have "accepted" where I am today as we all should. Wherever one is in their life at the moment, is exactly and precisely where one is supposed to be. Be it the lowest point, or the highest point in one's life, on the throne, or on the phone, making love, making war, breaking up, making up, excelling or failing, it's right where one should be and there is NOTHING absolutely nothing that one can do to change it. What one can do, is change their "attitude", and "accept" where they are. Easy? No, but necessary to get through life and all of it's trials and tribulations with ease.

        As I have never been one to be terribly religious and spiritual, I am in quite a state of shock. I have found a new sense of freedom, and excitement for life and the future. Call me insane, but just the other day as I was walking my dog I was treated to a sky filled with Angels. In the past I would have looked up and seen nothing more than clouds, but this particular day I saw what I believe was meant for me to see. The fact is, life happens as it's supposed to happen. Perhaps we didn't get the promotion we wanted, perhaps we didn't marry the man of our dreams, have the children we envisioned, or the life we had hoped for, but just maybe there's a very good reason for those things not working out as we'd planned. Life is filled with disappointments, fears, and tears, but in the end life will work out as it should and I truly believe that. Do I want to be single? No not really as I am sure many men and women don't. Am I okay being single? Yes as for the first time in a long time, I'm actually leaving myself open for the one that makes me stop saying, "I'd rather be single...for now!
(c) Sean Bianca 2014
     

          

Sunday, November 16, 2014

From "Hot", To "Homey"!



         From "hot", to "homey"? That is the question. How and why do so many women let themselves go from "hot" to "homey"? If single one mustn't worry if one is "hot", or "homey", but if in a relationship one should be concerned as to whether or not one is, "hot", or "homey". Not to say that one has to resign themselves to being "homey" as a single, but one's being "hot" as a single is not quite so important. Why does a single woman need to be "hot" when home alone? She doesn't. I have yet to meet my Prince Charming when home alone. Then again I did once get a date while taking out the garbage in my hottie nightie with tennis socks and sandals one evening. Just picture it, not a good look, but the nightie got the date hook line and sinker.

         Looking "hot"and sexy at home, when bopping around the house is not a difficult task .Men are relatively easy. Shortie short shorts, pajama bottoms, a tank top and braless, gets a man every time. Better still, put on a Pamela Anderson baby-doll nightie, and a woman will have her man wrapped around her little finger. Men are not difficult to please. All most men really need is sex, more sex, the thought of sex, and food. Remember the words "sex" and "sexy", and I give you a happy man. Unfortunately, all too often many women forget or cease to do the things that they were doing to entice and attract their man in the first place. Why do women do this? Because women feel they no longer need to do the things that attracted their man, as they have their man. Hence,"from hot, to homey."

      I have heard a good many men complain of how the women with whom they are involved, cease to do the things that "got" them in the first place. What attracted many men to their significant others was the fact that their significant other was "hot", and not "homey". A good many married men now walk around their homes in a stupor as to the hows and whys of their wives going from "hot", to "homey". Smart men will never ask their loved one why she is no longer prancing around the house in her cutsie nighties and tanks. These men will unhappily just accept sweats, and animal print pjs.  Not so swift men will question their loved one as to why she no longer looks "hot" when at home. This man's significant other will take offense as she will interpret her man as telling her that she is no longer "hot",and not that she no longer dresses "hot"or attempts to be "hot".

           

     What is "homey?" "Homey" is just as it sounds, "homey". When one is "homey", one puts on the oversized sweats, t-shirts, fluffy robes, or worse, "Roller Rabbit" pajamas with monkeys and elephants scattered about. What grown man is turned on by his wife or girlfriend in cutsey animal printed pjs? No man! One man confided that upon seeing his fiance in her monkey pajamas he felt compelled to read her a bedtime story, not screw her brains out! He has a point. This man asked, why do women do that? The woman that had him horny 24/7 with her hair down and tousled, now when home only wore a ponytail, The woman that got him to propose although adorable in her pajamas was no longer the sexpot that he was going to spend the rest of his life with.

     Why does it happen? From "hot", to "homey"?  Being comfortable and taking what we have for granted, that's why. Women get complacent in relationships and stop trying. A good number of women feel once they have a man they need not do much, to keep a man. When single, women primp, plump. pluck, dress and bend over backwards trying to impress the man with whom they are so taken by. Oh the lengths some women go to to be sexy to attract a man. Women get eyelash extensions, hair extensions,  boobalicious boobs, wear heels, tight dresses, and  sport sexy lingerie. They do this all in the name of attracting a man. It's quite amusing really. Now take that same woman and observe her after she's nabbed her man and she's officially gone from "hot", to "homey".

     From "hot" to "homey" is a serious issue as it may well cost a woman her man. Likewise from "sophisticated and sexy", to "slobbish and sloppy", is not what a woman wants in her man. As a man isn't turned on by ponytails and pajamas women are not turned on by saggy boxers and body odor. As men also get "comfortable", and "complacent", they too stop trying, and why should they, as they have the woman for whom they relentlessly pursued. Not only do men stop trying in appearance, but how they behave as well, going from humorous to horrendous and from pleasant to prickish and so on.

    From "hot" to "homey"? I say "NO". Relationships that were once hot and heavy do not have to go cool, cold and clammy. I do believe that men and women should be comfortable and be able to relax and just "be" when in a relationship. I also believe that BOTH men and women need to not take their significant other for granted. I think men and women should continue to look good and treat one another as they did when they were in courting. After my ex-husband married me I was treated to his picking his toes, picking his nose, and purposely blowing his gut up after dinner, and more in our family room. Mark my words, had my then hubby done any of those things prior to marriage I NEVER EVER EVER would have married him! I not being of the norm did in fact still try in my appearance. I was told to be more "homey" and I do believe he wanted "homely" as well. To each his or her own I say. My ex went from "dapper" to "dumpy" and I attempted to stay sexy and sophisticated. Perhaps my now ex hubby would be better suited for the woman who desires to be homey after settling down and I would be better suited to the man that prefers his girl to be "hot" instead of "homey". Then again maybe we just need to be who we really are when single and in courting to avoid being misled and disappointed. Personally I want a man that does still care about his appearance when in a significant other's presence. I want a relationship in which I am turned on and my man is still turned on. Otherwise, "I'd rather be single...for now!"
(c)Sean Bianca 2014

  

     

Sunday, November 9, 2014

It's Special!



      As a single I have never been a woman that has been the recipient of gifts of grandeur. Come to think of it as a married woman I wasn't one to receive great gifts either. I don't know what it is, I just seem to have a knack for attracting men that either don't buy women gifts, or do not care to want to buy a gift that one would like, much less love. Some women have a way of attracting good gift givers, and some women don't. Then again do these women attract men that like buying women gifts, or do they demand men who enjoy buying women gifts?

 My last gift from a boyfriend was a dying blue orchid. A dying blue orchid from Publix, a supermarket no less. Yes it was THAT bad! After that charming token of love, I received a candy ring from a date. As it was a first date I thought the ring to be cute, a bit juvenile, but cute. The orchid on the other hand is not surprisingly, a rather sore subject. The dying blue orchid will go down as my all time worst gift from a serious boyfriend in the history of my dating. Now there's quite a distinction, being a boyfriend that gave a girl her worst gift! Well at least that man has something he's accomplished, as he hasn't accomplished much, if anything at all.


        Needless to say, gifts are somewhat of a touchy subject with me. Thankfully I am not alone I. My predicament of both not receiving gifts, and being given less than phenomenal gifts is not only relegated to me. I have one friend who is still waiting for her new set of golf clubs from a serious beau. I told this friend as this man was now an "ex boyfriend" I did not see those clubs materializing anytime soon, as in never! I wish I could say I felt comfort in not being one who rarely receives gifts from a loved one, but I don't. I find it quite upsetting. Do I harp on it? No, but it is bothersome. However as it happens many women, and some men, are continuously in relationships with people that seem to not care to purchase their loved one a gift, or seem not to put much thought into the gift that they are buying.

      A good many men would say that women who complain of not receiving gifts and receiving horrendous gifts are materialistic, greedy and bitchy. A good many men would be correct, if they are speaking of a woman complaining about her new Mercedes, when she really wanted an Aston Martin. However, a whole lot of men would be wrong if they are speaking of a woman that would just like something that had some time ,and thought put into the gift. Many men would say women just want expensive gifts, and yes I agree, some women do only want expensive gifts. However, some women would like to be thought of and the expense is not the issue at all. Then again, I do believe one can and should be able to spend as one's budget is able, and a woman should understand. 

    "It's special!" Why do women like to receive gifts? Simple, because "it's special!" We women love it when someone says, " I love that bracelet, ring, scarf or handbag!"  We love it even more if we can say, " my boyfriend gave it to me!" Why? Because we are able to say that someone thought enough of us, to take the time and put the thought into getting us a gift that they thought we would really like. Simply stated, a gift from a man is not JUST about receiving a pair of earrings, a necklace, or a watch. It's much more than the gift. It's about it being "special", it's also because  our  special someone bought it for us!

   I'll never forget the time a friend of mine told me what her husband had done for their anniversary. This man had rented a limo, had candles lining the driveway of their home that they were in the process of renovating, hired a restaurant to provide the couple with a catered dinner, in what was to be their dining room and presented her with a stunning pair of earrings. As if all that were not impressive enough, this husband also finished the evening by renting a suite at the infamous "Biltmore Hotel" in Coral Gables, Florida. Was I jealous? A bit, but more than jealous I thought why can't my husband put a quarter of the effort this man put in to making an evening special and giving a gift that one would treasure?

     "It's special", what I and every other woman would give to be able to say the words "my boyfriend, fiancee or husband gave it to me." Funny thing is, there are women that are great at receiving gifts. Chanel bags galore, diamonds, cars, furs and more. Yes, some women just have a knack for somehow manipulating men into buying them whatever they want. How do they do it? Damned if I know. My friends can't figure it out either, as many of the women that receive spectacular gifts, are bonafide bitches. Maybe that's the key, be a bitch so that a man is forever trying to please you. Could I do it? Never. I cannot imagine asking or demanding a man buy me a gift and an expensive one at that.The truth is I don't want to manipulate a man into buying me a nice gift. I want a man to WANT to give me a nice gift. I would love to for once, be able to say the words, " thank you, my boyfriend bought that for me", instead of "thank you, I bought that last week", when complimented on a handbag, bracelet or ring.

     I guess I don't really get it. When I'm in love, or in like with someone, I want to buy that person gifts and spoil them. Not only boyfriends, but friends as well. I just love giving gifts, and I have been told I am far too generous as well. I gave one boyfriend a Cartier pen. Did this man appreciate it? No, not at all, it was in his center console of his car. I gave another man a nice watch. Was it appreciated? Yes he did appreciate it and for that I was grateful. Thinking back he was a good gift giver, as he spent every last cent he had to purchase me a Christmas gift that he thought I might like. I bought one boyfriend a slew of Ralph Lauren and Fila. The thanks I got was "I didn't ask you to buy those things for me". The point was I wanted to do those things as when I like someone I want to give that someone things. I once gave a friend a porcelain piggy bank from Tiffany's. I wanted to do that. I couldn't wait to go to her shower and see how she liked what I had picked out for her. I guess that's just me, and others as well. Some of us just like giving people gifts and spoiling them and others just don't.


       "It's special", is why both men and women who are genuine, like receiving gifts.It feels good to wear a scarf, bracelet or whatever someone else bought us. Whether it's a friend or a significant other, something that someone else bought us, feels different because it is different. A gift means something, a possession is nothing more than another possession. It's special is something to think about as the holidays are upon us. As I am a single I know I will not be the recipient of a gift from a special someone. Why? Easy, this is the time of year men stay away from women if they are single. If men are single at this time of year men stay single. We wouldn't want to have to buy a woman a gift, or for that matter take a woman out for New Years! I know the drill. No worries as at least this holiday season I won't be disappointed as my significant someone presents me with a dying plant. As opposed to being in a relationship and receiving a flower, "I'd rather be single...for now!"

(c)Sean Bianca 2014

     















































Sunday, November 2, 2014

Adults At Halloween


Halloween has never been a favorite holiday of mine. Why? I'm not quite sure. Other than getting a bag full of candy from dressing up and trick or treating I was never enthralled with Halloween. I don't really know as to why I wasn't a child that loved Halloween, I just didn't really like it. I was terrified of haunted houses, and hated being outside in the cold begging for candy. To me it just seemed easier to just go to a store and buy a bag of candy, but then again other than Halloween I never really ate candy.I guess as a kid I felt I knew what Halloween was  was really about. I knew. I was on to adults as to the true goal of Halloween.











    The goal of Halloween was not just about candy and costumes, it was much more than that. Halloween was a Holiday in which parents could dress their children up as ridiculously as possible and get a laugh. Seriously. I was a "piglet" one year. I was a cute piglet, but  how stupid did I feel? Very stupid. To this day I remember walking around in pink tights, and a stuffed pink pillow case with my legs sticking out. I also can recall my pig mask that made it next to impossible to breath and of course my squiggly tail on my toosh. I was not comfortable, I was anything but. I was not happy either, as my family laughed in hysterics as they watched me go off trick or treating. I was a pudgy piglet that thought, what we kids do for candy!  
 Another year I was an old lady tennis player. Oh how original was I? Not very until my mother got involved. Once she got involved all bets were off. My mother's opinion was that if one was going to dress up for Halloween they had to "do it up right". Her motto was always, " do it big don't don't doit at all!" With the going all out attitude I was not just any tennis player. I was a plump, big blossomed, old lady tennis player. I had tennis balls for boobs, and a short blond wig I was off to trick or treat and give the grown ups a laugh!  I felt like a Village idiot, but I was a hoot! Even funnier is that I now know I was not a little old lady, but "Chris Evert", oops.
        Fast forward to Halloween as an adult, and Halloween can be even more fun than as a child. One year I attended a Miami shindig at the Vizcayan Halloween Sundowner. I was a tacky tourist and I was a sketch. However my costume certainly wasn't going to attract a man as the numerous other get ups that women wore. This was my first Halloween dressing up as an adult, and clearly I was not in the "know" as to what one should wear to a Halloween party as an adult. As an adult I learned that Halloween was about how one could wear as little as possible, as in practically naked, and get away with it. Halloween was no longer about ghosts and goblins, it was about sexy, slutty, stewardesses, strippers, policewomen in garter belts, mermaids and more. As if having half naked women wasn't bad enough, men strutted their stuff as well, in chaps, and weiner wrappers. What were they? They were strippers, and bull riders flaunting their things. Yes, Halloween as an adult I learned was much more than dressing up and trick or treating. I caught on quite quickly that Halloween was about wearing next to nothing and drinking oneself into a stupor. Fun? I'm not so sure as I'm quite certain many had one hell of a hangover the following morning. Yes, Halloween as an adult is much different than it was a child.

         Adults at Halloween is indeed different from Halloween as a child. Call me a party pooper, but personally I'd rather see small children dressed up as little lions, princesses, and super heroes, than adults dressed up as slutty somethings any day. Let's be honest, many women today need not dress up as a slut as many have already earned that title. Halloween for some adults is about more than dressing in little, and drinking oneself silly, its about dressing up, having fun with friends and waking up and remembering the morning after what one did, said and with whom, and those are the ones truly having fun. For myself, I rather like my dressing up as a riot, and like a man to do the same. A man parading his package? I'd rather be single...for now!
(c) Sean Bianca 2014 




    

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

The Way To A Man's Heart Is......



For years it has been said, "that the way to a man's heart was through his stomach". Women have been told for centuries that the quickest way to have a man fall in love, was to cook him a good meal. As a teen I had visions of whipping up some dynamic dish to my dream man and shortly after being presented with a dynamite diamond. Yea, sure, perhaps in a another ERA! The truth is quite simple, the way to a man's heart, is with "sex". "Sex, sex, sex", and more "sex"!

      As per an interview with KISS rocker Gene Simmons, it was stated that all men ever think about is "sex", not food. While food is a near tie with "sex", put both a woman with big boobs and a steak in front of a man and the choice will be "boobs". I once had a boyfriend that upon observing numerous women with boob jobs, hswore Publix sold fake boobs in South Florida. Perhaps supermarkets should sell boobs, then women could obtain their boobs and their beef! While a gourmet meal may be a nice perk for a man, a gourmet meal is NOT what will win a man over. Good sex will win a man over. Truth be known bad sex will win a man over as well.

      As I must admit I am far from being the next "Julia Child" I must say I am somewhat relieved that I need not cook a gourmet meal to get a man, but at the same time somewhat perplexed on sex being what wins over a man. As sex is number one in a man's life, sex also tends to also lose men as well. While I agree with Gene Simmons that food is not how one gets a man, I do not think "sex", good or bad keeps a man. Men may love sex, but men love a hunt as well. "Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free", is a saying that still, today is quite true. Men who are able to have sex too easily are on to the next way, too quickly for any woman to depend on "sex" to get, and keep a man, and if sex and food are not the way to a man's heart, what is the way to a man's heart?

    "Sex" may well get and keep a man interested for awhile, but not forever. A gourmet meal may keep a man around for a time as well as good sex. However I must say that good food and great sex combined do not insure a woman's security in keeping a man's heart as I have known numerous women that would still be married if the former were true. I believe that the way to a man's heart is a combination. I believe that a man must first and foremost have his sex, and food is a plus, but it's a woman's mind that is the winner. A man must respect and be intrigued with a woman before he can ever fall in love. I believe men must be continuously entertained to keep them interested as most men do have the attention span of a flea and for that I am in like Flynn, as if it were my cooking that were dependent upon getting a man I'd forever be single and looking. As after a meal by "moi" men would walk away and say, "I'd rather be single...for now!" 
(c) Sean Bianca 2014